Marvin & the Neutered Cat
Seems Marvin inspired JJ over at Christian, Gay and Confused to muse about her own experiences with trying to be fixed sexually. She provides sharp insight into Marvin's personality.I listen to Marvin Bloom, and I think that if he is for real, then I wish him well… but I also worry, because he seems unwell emotionally… and spiritually too, actually. Like something significant is being smothered in him… like he’s only using half of his person. I don’t really know how to explain it any better. I think you’ll hear what I mean if you listen to his posts. You know how when you neuter a cat, it gets kind of sluggish? It’s kind of like that. Not that he’s sluggish, but part of him is.Her analysis about her own process and her honesty causes me to reflect about my own drive to become something other than gay.
Hat tip to Willie Hewes.
posted by Peterson Toscano @ 3:27 PM
4 Comments:
Yeah, JJ rocks. (And I get a hat-tip! Whooo!)
"Sharp insight", eh? I would have said "vague and nebulous".
Thanks though!
Oh, and what's a 'hat-tip'?
Oh... and, Hi Willie Hewes! You rock too!
JJ, you have struck a nerve with Marvin and I need to warn you that he is planning on responding to your post about him (I fax him all comments about him and thought he would be interested in your post.) Just want to give you a head's up.
Hat-tip, well, in the bloggosphere when we get a story or link from another blogger, either from their site or through and e-mail or IM, we then tip our hat to that person in acknowlegement.
Yes, Willie Hewes does rock too!
[I posted this response to the "neutered cat" post on Peterson's MySpace mirror blog, and he asked me to repost it here. Here ya go, Peterson.]
Yes! I've had similar thoughts about Marvin. That's what makes him such a great Ex-Gay Everyman, I think.
Here is an analogy that might work, or it might make me sound like a nut. Once I had a semi-severe back injury. Well, not like I had to go into the hospital or something, but it took a while to recover.
And the funniest thing about having a back injury is you never realize until your back doesn't work anymore all the things that you were using your back muscles for, and now you can't do those things. Like you can't get out of a chair. You can't pull weeds. You can't reach the stuff on the top of the refrigerator. You drop your keys on the floor, forget it. They're gonna stay on the floor.
And then you say to yourself "That's funny. It never occurred to me I needed my back to do any of that stuff."
To me, that's kind of what happens when you suppress your sexuality. You think that your sexuality is just something you use when you're on a date, or having sex or looking around for a hook up, but really you need your sexuality for lots of other stuff. Your creativity, your passion, your appreciation of a beautiful spring day or the sound of a clarinet playing "Begin the Beguine." Your sexuality is part of what makes all of that happen.
You don't think about it. You're not really aware of it, but your sexuality is part of the complex formula that brings all that joy into your life. As Edith Piaf would say "Oui, la vie, c'est l'amour, et l'amour, c'est la vie."
So when Marvin represses his sexuality, he's really repressing a lot more than he bargained for.
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